I am still grieving the loss of my sister-in-law, Amie, but I find comfort in knowing how deeply loved she was; not only by her friends but even by people who had only met her.

Seventeen years ago, when my mother passed away, Amie was devastated, too. Mama had treated her like her own child, and I believe that the love she received from Mama left a lasting impression on her. I remember being fascinated by Mama’s wide circle of friends, and perhaps some of that rubbed off on Amie. As she grew older, she became more comfortable meeting new people and building friendships of her own. She also never failed to check on us regularly, making sure that the people she cared about knew they were remembered.

Looking back, I realize that this was one of the things I may have forgotten about my mother. I became so preoccupied with building a life for my own family that I had very little time or energy left to reach out to others. With young children to raise and a demanding career to manage, maintaining friendships and keeping in touch with family often took a backseat.

I don’t think I became distant because I didn’t care. I had my own struggles to work through, responsibilities to fulfill, and dreams I wanted to achieve. Like many people, I thought that once I had built a more comfortable life, I would have more time to enjoy it with the people around me.

But losing Amie made me realize something: life doesn’t wait for us to finish sorting everything out. While we are busy chasing our dreams, solving our problems, and trying to secure a better future, time continues to move forward. Before we know it, years have passed, and the finish line we have been chasing has moved a little farther away.

There is nothing wrong with wanting a better life. We work hard because we want to provide for our families, give our children a better future, and enjoy the fruits of our labor someday. But perhaps we sometimes forget that we don’t have to wait until we have achieved everything before we start living.

We can build our dreams while nurturing friendships. We can pursue our careers while making time for family. We can work toward a better future without forgetting the people who are part of our present.

This is what changed in me when I lost my beloved sister-in-law. I want to be more intentional about spending time with my family and friends, reaching out to people I care about, and perhaps even building new friendships along the way.

I want to stop postponing the simple joys of being with the people who matter while waiting for life to become less complicated.

Because in the end, a good life is not measured only by what we have achieved, what we have accumulated, or how far we have come. It is also measured by the people we have loved, the friendships we have nurtured, and the moments we have shared.

And perhaps the greatest lesson Amie has left me is this: don’t spend so much time building a life that you forget to live it with the people you love.