The World of Second Chances

Agnes of God (1985 Film)

July 16, 2018

That’s Entertainment

I was trying to remember old movies from the 80’s when “Agnes of God” popped into my mind. Meg Tilly played the role of Agnes. In case you are not familiar with Meg, she’s the ex of Collin Firth and in case you do not know Collin Firth, just watch Mamma Mia. 🙂

Agnes of God is a story about a young nun who is accused of killing her newborn baby. Dr. Martha Livingston (Farrah Fawcett) is assigned to assess her mental state. Dr. Livingston sometimes clashes with the mother superior (Anne Bancroft) but gets her cooperation in the end.

I read that there’s a real-life story about this and the movie is inspired from it but I’ll just focus on the movie. From my perspective, Agnes is a deeply-troubled young woman who experienced abuse from home. It is not just physical, emotional and mental abuse but also sexual abuse. The perpetrator is no less than her mother because her mother hates her so much; she’s even considered a mistake. If Agnes experienced sexual abuse from a young age, then the concept of sex is nothing new to her.

Agnes is raised as an illiterate with no interface from the outside world. The convent becomes her second home when her mother died. Her friendship with Sister Paul and their secret escapade puzzled me at first but later on changed my mind about my perception of the elderly nun. My take is, the reason why Sister Paul told her about a secret passage from the convent to the fields is because she wanted Agnes to experience life outside of the convent; unassuming of the danger that could happen to her.

Maybe, in one of her lone escapades, Agnes met a man who took a fancy on her and she mentioned about the secret passageway from the fields to the convent. Being too trusting, she allowed the man to enter her room. Maybe feelings were also developed but he’s not the type who would wait so on the 7th meeting, he forced himself on him. Because she’s not immaculately innocent, she knew that she was violated that’s why she burned her bedsheet.

With regard to her growing tummy, I think that she really does not know that that’s pregnancy. When she started starving herself because she thought she’s getting too fat, that’s her old tortured soul speaking. When she delivered the baby, she was horrified and angry for bringing another “mistake” so she did him/her a “favor” by killing him/her.

My disappointment in the story is her rapist was never caught and identified and maybe ready to attack another nun or another woman.
Ang Selfie!

June 9, 2018

Life & Love

Suportado ko ang mahihilig mag-selfie. Hindi ako mahilig sa selfie; o hindi sa level na parang sa iba pero suportado ko sya. Hindi naman lahat ng nagse-selfie ay GGSS (gandang-ganda sa sarili). Hindi naman lahat ng nase-selfie ay selfish. Isa din ako sa mga taong mahilig mag-like sa mga selfie photos. Wag mag-assume ang iba pero hindi dahil gandang-ganda ako o gwapong-gwapo sa inyo; the act of taking a selfie picture and then posting it on your wall is the reason for my “like.”

Madalas kong sabihin na “Ambilis ng panahon.”

“Time flies.”

“Where did the time go?”

Hindi yan para magpaka-deep lang ako. Talagang nawiwindang ako minsan sa bilis ng panahon. At dahil ako ang taong may pinakakonting collection ng sarili kong larawan, nanghihinayang ako dahil hindi ko na-capture ang precious moments ko dati. Kaya bagama’t hindi ako ma-selfie na tao, sinisikap kong kumuha ng mga litrato ko ngayon sa bawat okasyong meron ako sa kasalukuyan kong buhay.

Isang na-realize ko kaka-stalk sa profile ng iba ay totoong ang physical beauty ay nawawala o kumukupas through the years. May isa akong hinahangaang beauty queen at medyo nagulat ako na very ordinary na syang tignan ngayon. Hindi na nya panahon. Ang maganda lang sa nangyari, hindi lang magandang mukha ang meron sya kundi natural na talino at diskarte. Tumandang may pinagkatandaan, kumbaga.

Meron din akong na-stalk na hiyang-hiyang mag-post ng childhood photos nya pero minu-minutong mag-post ng picture nya ngayon. Late bloomer sya. Gusto nyang iparating sa mundo na “the ugly duckling turned out to be a beautiful swan.” Kung saan sya proud, okay lang. Buhay nya yun.

But it also makes me think that 10 year from now, mawawala din ang physical beauty na yan. Pansamantala lang yan. Natutuyo din. Kaya ang payo ko sa mga nakikipag-boyfriend o girlfriend sa ngayon ay humanap kayo ng makakasundo nyo sa ugali at pananaw sa buhay. Ang ganda o gwapo ng mukha, kumukupas yan. Baka kaso matanso kapag pumangit na ang partner ninyo ay masama pa ang ugali.
Movie Watching Through The Years

June 7, 2018

That’s Entertainment

So this is not about Jurassic World Fallen Kingdom because the movie is average (3 out of 5 stars) and I promised my friend not to talk much about it (anti-spoiler). This is just about me and my perception about going to the movie in my mid-life.

My first movie house experience was in Balanga. I was 5 years old then. The movie house looked more like a religious fellowship activity with its long chairs. (Imagine the chairs inside the Catholic church, that’s it.) We were too close to the big screen and every time the industrial fan hit it, it waved and distracted us.

My parents’ parenting style was too old-fashioned during the 80’s. We were not allowed to go to the movie house with our friends because according to them, it was not a safe place for anybody. There was a time when selected students of our class went to Clark, Pampanga as a treat for something that I could not remember. When we went back to Balanga, one of our classmates suggested to watch a Vilma Santos movie in Recar Cinema. I told the group that I could not go with them because I was afraid of being reprimanded by my father but one of the teachers assured me that they would explain to my father, when needed.

Most of my classmates wanted a Tito, Vic and Joey starrer and one of them warned me that Dolzura Cortes was an adult movie so I went with them instead. That was my first movie house experience in the company of friends instead of my family. Speaking of my family, expect a Friday date with them everytime FPJ had a new movie. Back when I was younger, my mother and aunt used to bring me to the movie house to watch Sharon and Gabby. I was bored; I was too young for love stories then.

In high school, believe it or not, we were required to watch movies in Bataan Cinema for our essay writing. Among the movies that the school required were Ghost, Beatlejuice and Sakay. Quiet and guarded most of the time, one of my classmates asked me if I was okay. I told him (he was gay at that time) that I was not used to watching movies with friends and our schoolmates’ noise were getting into my nerves.

College gave me the liberty to decide on my own. I realized that the movie house was not really an evil place where maniacs and thiefs thrived on. Rather, it was a little dark place where lovers met to express and explore. For the first time, I felt safe inside a movie house with my then boyfriend. I forgot the name of the movie house in Magsaysay Avenue (Baguio) where they offered a double movie to a price of one.

When I started working and earning, dating meant going to the movie house every week. Time Square Cinema was part of my young life in Olongapo and the Harry Potter fever has not yet started there when we watched it. Watching movies in the movie house became seldom and seldom when I moved to my current residence.

Since I got busy juggling my time between work and family, almost all of my activities when I was single took a backseat. The second movie that I watched (in the movie house) as a married woman was Fantastic 4 and that was 3 years ago. We brought our children and it was a playful disaster! Jurassic World Fallen Kingdom looked promising so we brought our children last night to watch. Waltermart Cinema was good enough. The air-conditioning units were working, the floors were clean and the seats did not smell bad. Despite this, I was paranoid and feared about bedbugs on the seats! I turned on my phone’s torch to check further and when everything looked clean, I focused on watching the movie. Of course, there were instances when one of boys would comment about the movie and there I was telling him to keep quiet. The popcorn did not taste fresh and the soda smelled a little fishy. Between the two, I could tolerate the popcorn but not a fishy-smelling soda!

As an adult and in the company of young kids, movie watching is an extension of babysitting. As a giddy teenager, it was automatic that my date provided for the jacket to make me comfortable. It was a rule that my date would be the one to fall in line to get me a food or drink. Now, I am the one doing all those to my kids and I love it.

Did I enjoy Jurassic World?

No.

Did I feel comfortable inside the Waltermart Cinema?

No.

Why?

I am paranoid.

Will I watch another movie again at the movie house?

Yes, when my kids want us to.
Recommendation: Foot Peeling Mask

June 5, 2018

Career, Finance & Product

Warning: Graphic images. LOL!

Our feet are the most neglected part of our body. Between a facial and a foot spa, I am more religious when it comes to the former. Don’t get me wrong; I have my foot spa kit at home but my problem was my rough heels. My foot spa session at the salon did not help eliminate that rough part either so I decided to try Purederm Shiny and Soft Foot Peeling Mask.

The foot masks come in a shoe-like wrap; you can wear socks over it. You just leave it for 60 to 90 minutes. The spicy sensation is distracting; wear it off if you can’t tolerate it because your skin might be having allergic reaction to the substance.

After 60 to 90 minutes, remove the mask and wash your feet with water. You can feel the smoothness thereafter. After 7 days, expect the peeling and voila! Better texture and no rough heels!

I got this product from an online seller—my friend, actually. I recommend this product to those who are too busy to go to the spa. It’s cheap, it’s effective and definitely, this will be my new monthly beauty routine!
Recommendation: Belo Kojic Soap

June 1, 2018

Career, Finance & Product

I was never a fan of whitening soap and lotion because I had bad experience with anything that contained papaya enzyme. There are two reasons why I tried the kojic soap by Belo:

1. Hiyang ako kay Belo.

2. Na-sunburn ako nang todo some two weeks ago.

During the first three days of my sunburn, I actually fell in love with my tan. It just felt healthy and different. I felt like an active beach girl! But on the 4th day, my skin started to feel dry so I decided to try kojic soap to hasten the peeling. On the 3rd day after using Belo kojic soap, my skin started to peel without the discomfort and pain. This was good because my skin used to react with papaya soap. On the 10th day after using kojic soap by Belo, you can notice that my sunburned skin is lighter.

If papaya soap is not for you, then you might want to try using kojic soap by Belo. It’s cheap, it’s affordable and it’s effective. Just don’t forget to use a sunblock during the process.

Product Rating: 5 out of 5 stars
Organic: Then and Now

May 29, 2018

Career, Finance & Product

I’ve been wondering what’s the big deal about organic foods and products when we had so much of them during the 80’s.

My grandmother had native chickens that provided us with brown eggs for breakfast. She gave us a hen and a rooster that became the ancestors of our brood. Our chicken supplied us with eggs for breakfast. The hassle was, it was like Easter Sunday everyday because some of them had the habit of laying eggs just anywhere! One time, my classmate saw me picking some eggs and innocently asked, “You don’t buy eggs from the grocery?” Don’t get me started about how life was in the 80’s because the grocery that she mentioned about was no Savemore but a little grocery near the Balanga Water District.

There was also a time when tomatoes and snow cabbages were harvested straight from the garden plot because our teachers required us to grow our own vegetables. Tea time meant boiling some dried leaves from the following trees: guava, banana, mango, pandan, alagao and avocado. Now, my tea time is getting a pack of Lipton from the box.We had bottles of fresh carabao milk every Saturday; powdered milk was considered expensive. We had powdered corns for snack and sugarcane for dessert. We climbed trees to pick fruits, picked sampaguita flowers to make a potpourri, used alum as deodorant and coconut oil as hair conditioner.

Looking back, I equated backyard farming to being penniless because instead of buying from the market, there we were cultivating soil. If not for the grades, we wouldn’t do that. Looking back when most of what I mentioned above were still free, I felt that there was a better way of doing or gettting things. I grew up in the age of commercialism when using a sanitary pad was more practical than a cloth pad. I grew up watching children eating cornflakes and other cereals. I salivated over imported chocolates because they were only available whenever a relative would come home from abroad. I asked my mother to buy an air-freshener because my sampaguita potpourri was too old-fashioned. I started using commercial deodorants when I was a teenager because that was what my classmates did and I didn’t want to feel left-out. My first hair conditioner was a green Cream Silk because coconut oil smelled funny. In short, I shied away from anything organic because I was too brainwashed about commercialism and being “in.”

Three decades later, organic is back and the concept is even supported by celebrities and famous personalities. Me as a mature person now realize that what we were doing in the 80’s was on the right track until commercialism distracted us from it. Well, promoting organic maybe another marketing ploy unless a person resorts to growing his own food. The important thing now is some people are campaigning about a healthy alternative to the foods that our current market is offering.

Three decades ago, organic was uncool, unsophisticated and backward. Now, organic means embracing the healthy lifestyle. To some extent, it is even a status symbol. 😉
Huwag Mong Buhayin Ang Bangkay is a Mother’s Day Movie (seriously!)

May 26, 2018

That’s Entertainment

Okay, so this is so 80’s because the movie was shown in the late 80’s. I used to be very scared of this movie!

Disclaimer to those who still want to watch: Spoiler alert!

The story is just the usual plot; a mother (Charito Solis) who favors the younger son (Jestoni Alarcon) over the elder son (Ricky Davao) resulting to sibling rivalry. The rivalry thickens when both brothers fall in love with the same girl (Pinky Suarez).

Helen (Pinky Suarez) uses Robertito (Jestoni) for her personal gain so it is easy for her to dump him in favor of his elder brother (Ricky). Heartbroken, Robertito tries to end his life but is stopped by his mother (Charito) and Julie (Rita Avila) just in time. Robertito and Julie start dating much to the chagrin of Julie’s suitor (Jojo Alejar) and reveals that Julie is just playing with his feelings.

Believing that Julie (Rita) is just playing, he leaves the house and meets a fatal road accident. The doctors cannot do anything to save his life so his mother resorts to the mysterious Lucio (Ruben Rustia) to repair his damaged body.

Unable to cope up with his demise, his mother brings his corpse home and lets herself to believe that a miracle will happen. Her relationship with his elder son (Ricky) worsens because she blames him for Robertito’s death. She shuns away visitors to keep her secret that she is hiding her son’s corpse; only her loyal servants and Julie are allowed inside the house.

Her faith in God is tested when despite her pleadings that God brings back to life her son yet he decomposes, she resorts to evil faith. Satan grants her wish but her son is no longer the meek child she knows. Robertito turns into a zombie-monster and starts to attack all those that will either expose him or hurt him in the past. He kills their male servant and Helen (Pinky) in a series of attacks.

During a sacrificial ritual, Lucio (Ruben) instructs Robertito (Jestoni) to kill Julie (Rita) but his mom (Charito Solis) attacks one of Lucio’s men, thus giving way for Julie to escape.

The final scene in the cemetery is the fighting of both brothers and Gabriel (Ricky) being saved by his mom Aurora (Charito) from Robertito’s attack. Robertito weakens from “crucifix exposure” and goes to Aurora for that final good-bye. Wounded, Aurora dies with Robertito on her lap.

Gabriel, who has always felt insecure about his brother, asks the priest why his mother saved him. The priest replies that it is because he (Gabriel) is her (Aurora) son as if telling us that in the end, Aurora finally treated her sons fairly.

Movie Review:

As I mentioned earlier, this is just the usual sibling rivalry plot and the movie is even low-budgeted. The saving grace of this movie are the actors.

Charito Solis is excellent in her role and you can feel her pain when Robertito dies. Ricky Davao is supposed to be the antagonist here but you can also feel his pain and longing for his mother’s love. Jestoni Alarcon looks vulnerable as Robertito and somewhat funny as the zombie-monster. Of course, this is the 80’s so expect Rita Avila as his leading lady.

Ironically, I found the second half of the movie boring when Robertito turned into a zombie-monster. Why can’t they realize that Robertito is afraid of the crucifix? Julie could have survived had she realized that the reason why Robertito fell down during the first attack was because of the crucifix on the wall. Even the parish priest did little to help realize that.

Without looking at the inconsistencies, well, this movie is all about motherly love and how an unequal love can lead to sibling rivalry. This movie is also about a mother’s repent when she realizes that too much motherly love is toxic. This movie is about reminding mothers that there is little that we can do about our children’s behavior later in life because the formative years are the most important. In the case of Robertito, Aurora probably shielded him from pain and rejection when he was small so he grew up weak and dependent.

From a point of view of a sister, the movie reminds us that while unequal love is not okay, sometimes we just have to understand that our parents give love to our siblings who need it the most but it doesn’t mean that we are not important.

Conclusion: 4 out of 5 stars