The World of Second Chances

Positive Energy In The House

June 29, 2013

Wedding & Family Life

Go away, negative energy!

When I was still working in Olongapo, I rented a room in one of the buildings in Magsaysay Avenue. The room had its own restroom and a wooden bed (with Uratex foam) that was good for two people. The jalousie window was my only concern because of limited privacy. I stayed on the second floor and the occupants of the next building could see my whole area if I would open the windows. Anyway, I put on some green plastic sheet on the jalousies for the purpose of blocking off some light.

It was not the perfect place because we were not allowed to cook but since I took out food either from the company canteen or from the fastfood, it was a non-issue. The water supply was good except for some repairs and maintenance once in a while that left us with no water for five hours.

In all my years of stay in that room from 2001 to 2006, I was always sick and emotionally-drained. There was this sort of negative energy all over my room but I just could not pinpoint what exactly it was. Ghost? No, I would feel one if there was one. Maybe I could even see one, but there was none. The list of illness went from bronchitis to edema to clinical depression and so on. There were times when I felt like I was afraid of something but I could not determine what and why.

Before the place was temporarily closed for renovation in January 2006, I got the chance to have a small talk with the flower shop assistant at the ground floor of the building. I asked her about the history of the building and who the original owners were. She told me that their flower shop used to be a bar at the height of the “American era” in Olongapo and the upper part of the building used to be an inn.

Back in my room, I recalled my first impression of the room and I remembered the great sadness that I felt when I entered the room five years ago. The room was full of negative energies of perhaps lust, greed, dishonesty and anger. The negative energies haunted the room for years and the occupants felt it one way or another.

I don’t need the negative emotional baggage of the past so I am trying to create happy and meaningful memories in my current place to replace all the negative energies that the previous occupants left on us. Prayer is a powerful tool to drive away any negative energies of the past. My children’s laughter replaced whatever tears (from the former occupants) fell on our current place. More than a physically clean house, we need a house that’s full of positive energy of love and optimism. We can do that by getting rid of heated arguments, gossips, feelings of hopelessness, jealousy and dishonesty.
Where to, Mister?

June 28, 2013

Poems & Stories

Where to, Mister?
You seem lost, you don’t belong here anymore.
Don’t you remember what happened?
When two men cut your fairy-tale life

Where to, Mister?
This is not your place anymore.
You’ve hurt your wife so badly.
You left a beautiful child.

Where to, Mister?
For sure you lived a meaningful life.
You did not expect this to happen.
How ready are you in leaving us behind?

Where to, Mister?
Your name suddenly became everyone’s favorite.
Ironically, you hated publicity.
Fate gave you things that you did not wish for.

Where to, Mister?
Now go to sleep deeply.
Someday, your child will know you better.
From people that you encountered.
My Romance With Charles Vath

June 19, 2013

Life & Love

Tall and big

I never failed to visit Charles Vath in all my years of stay in Baguio. There was something in Charles that kept me coming back day after day. Charles intimidated me on our first meeting. How could somebody so famous and big accommodate a simple college girl like me? Walking around Charles’ place was like understanding his rich past and the honors that came with it.

“Impressed?” he asked when I stood beside his antique collection.

Oh, the artistic treasures of Baguio was just within my reach!

“You could see my own printing press at the ground floor,” he said.

I wondered how did he know my penchant for books and reading materials. Were my actions and gazes too predictable or enough of a give-away to show how I was feeling inside?

Charles led me to the upper floors to read more books. He showed me an old copy of Shakespeare’s book and started to read the sonnets. I blushed and turned myself away.

The daily meet ups at Charles’ place became a routine. I would go there to make my assignments, to review for the exams and to kill time when bored. My romance with Charles Vath had a timeline and I knew that this special relationship would only last for five years; unless circumstances would force me to go beyond that.

I have yet to see another Charles Vath who would be a source of reference and hard work for students of this generation when the easier way is to click one’s mouse to google.

I have yet to see another Charles Vath who would home a region’s artistic relics and be a shelter to thousands of books.

I have yet to see another Charles Vath so big and tall; mighty and majestic.

My romance with Charles Vath ended in March 2000. If there is one place in my alma mater that I miss so much other than the Otto Hahn Building, it would definitely be the Charles Vath Library Building.
Dreaming Big and Overcoming The Obstacles

June 18, 2013

Life & Love

Wala akong sasagasaan sa pangarap ko!

A kindergarten teacher asked her pupil.

“What do you want to be when you grow up?”

The pupil replied, “I want to be a doctor.”

“Why a doctor?”

“I want to help the poor people.”

Years later, the kindergarten pupil did not become a doctor but an engineer, instead. It is a profession and a career that is very different from what she dreamed of as a kid. Nevertheless, she is happy with her work and continues to strive hard each day.

I am that kid.

I couldn’t recall what urged me to tell my teacher that I wanted to be a doctor when there was no role model that I could connect with in the first place. Maybe most of the kids want to be a doctor, anyway.

People have their own personal and professional dreams but only a handful turn their dreams into reality. Sometimes, it’s not the lack of resources that cut them off the race but rather how their attitude affects their way of thinking and their way of life.

Start your year by DREAMING. Start your quarter by DREAMING. Working on a DREAM is better than doing all those everyday stuffs that has no value in the long run.

I consider my 2013 as my awakening year; I have this paradigm shift on values, priorities, way of life and way of thinking. For the first time in my life, instead of making New Year’s resolutions, I planned my 2013 with specific objective, targets and timeline. I did my SWOT (strength-weakness-opportunity-threat) analysis and I was astounded to know in which areas I was lagging and advancing.

Overcome the obstacles. If it cannot be eliminated, have it reduced.

1. Use people resource- No man is an island and I now fully understand the value of people resource. What you cannot do, you must outsource. From a cost perspective, it is cheaper to hire somebody to do the job rather than learn the job and lag behind from the target or timeline. I used to be jack of all trades until I realized that mastering a major skill or two will keep me more value-adding than trying to juggle it all.

2. Monitor your net worth- Most of us would rather react than act on a situation especially if it concerns our financials. The less cash on hand and cash in bank you have, the more you need to keep an eye on your cash flow. Incoming cash must always be greater than outgoing cash. Else, you would end up hard up and financial independence plays a BIG role in attaining one’s dreams.

3. Ignore the people who treat you like shit- In the corporate (dog-eat-dog) world, it’s not unusual to run into some sort of a walking tupperware or a gossip monger. Keep your relationship with your colleagues on the professional level. My big mistake in my first job was to be very open about my personal life; it made me vulnerable to gossips and fake friends. I enjoy my privacy better in my current job and I don’t share my personal life with just any person. Avoid the credit-grabbers, too. You wouldn’t get too far in your current position if all your hard work are being credited to some suckers.

4. Lack of confidence kills- Believe in yourself. Nobody would appreciate you in the first place unless you believe first in yourself.

5. Burn out is depressing- A balanced work life with enough sleep everyday is like working with a fully charged energy.

Remember, dreaming is like looking at an objective in a fantasy world but working out to attain that dream keeps us grounded to reality.

You, what is your dream and how are you working on it?
Dorm Sweet Dorm

June 12, 2013

Life & Love

My second home–Baguio.

It was May, 1994. All my things were packed and squeezed into the tiny compartment of my grandmother’s owner-type jeep. We drove into my grandmother’s place to say good-bye. My grandmother went out of her house to meet us. Tears were slowly building up to her eyes. She was the type of person who could hold a tear. I went out of the vehicle to hug her and kiss her. I knew that my grandmother preferred me to stay and study in a local school. I loved her so much but I just couldn’t afford to miss the opportunity to start a new chapter of my life away from home. She told me to take care of myself…ah, I was teary-eyed at this point.

It was my first time to live my life independently. It was my first time to go to Baguio. My youngest brother who was two years old at that time was seated beside me. It was deja vu last Saturday when Chariz waved good-bye to her young brothers. While we were driving up the Marcos Highway, I could feel the highland air greeting me. I was just so excited to see the city.

Forty-five minutes later, we were there at the heart of the city. Baguio did not fail my expectations. We went to the boarding house referred to by a neighbor. I proceeded to the balcony to see more of the place. The thick white fog welcomed me. My mother told me that it was fog and not smoke as I initially thought.

The whole family was with me during my enrollment. When it was time for my family to go back home, reality quickly settled in. I would be away from my family for the first time in my life. I would be sharing a room with five other strangers. I would terribly miss my family no matter how imperfect our relationship was.

I cried silently. My father saw me and tapped me on the shoulder. My mother cried, too.

“This is what you wanted eh,” she said.

I hugged everyone except my second brother and then they left. I was left alone in the room with no one to turn to. Occasionally, the caretaker would knock on my door to check on me. Since I was on a board and lodging scheme, I was burning time and hoped that the days would pass by quickly.

Kids today are luckier to have their own cellphone and computer for email and chatting; they can communicate with their families easily. During my time, I was relying on the landline for communication. There was even a time when I sent snail mails to my family and friends.

The biggest challenge was adapting to Northen Luzon’s culture and my boardmate’s peculiarity, as well. Nevertheless, I forged genuine friendships with some of them. Friendship that I treasure up to now.

How could I forget my dormmates who:
1. Lent me her necklace when I went out on a date with an ROTC officer during his Sponsorship Night.
2. Scolded me when I was being too childish.
3. Gave me sound advice about some infatuations.
4. Shared food with me.
5. Accompanied me at the Hangar Market to get my allowance.
6. Accompanied me at the bus station every time I would go home.
7. Helped me with my Technical Drawing subject.

🙂
Nombre Español

June 7, 2013

Life & Love

Hermoso bebe!

I got a little confused about a certain book author named Miguel de Cervantes Saavedra. He is the author of the book “Don Quixote dela Mancha.” It is an old book and I remember hearing his name during a classroom discussion in college.

How should we address him if we happen to meet him? Would it be Mr. Miguel Saavedra or Mr. Miguel Cervantes? For us who are not accustomed to Spanish naming, we would commit the mistake of addressing him as Mr. Miguel Saavedra. But hey, Saavedra is his mother’s last name!

Example 1:
Mother- Leonor Saavedra
Father- Rodrigo Cervantes
Child- Miguel de Cervantes Saavedra

Notice how the father’s last name comes after the child’s first name then the mother’s last name comes in last. Confusing? That’s how Spanish naming is all about.

Example 2:
Mother- Encarna Sanchez
Father- Eduardo Cruz
Child- Penelope Cruz Sanchez

Of course, who doesn’t know Penelope Cruz?

Example 3:
Mother- Amalia Rivera
Father- Francisco Javier Gracia Alonso
Child- Marian Gracia Rivera

Francisco Javier is treated as first name; Javier is not Marian’s father’s last name. I got a little confused years back when Marian was introduced as Marian Gracia Rivera in Jessica Soho’s “Kapuso Mo.” I thought there was an error because I was familiar with Gracia as her father’s last name and not Rivera.

My fascination with Spanish names is evident with how I named my youngest child; Francesc Rubio. Francec, though it doesn’t sound Spanish, is actually a Catalan name.
Wo Ai Ni, Baby 59!

May 29, 2013

Wedding & Family Life

Who would throw away an angel like this?

Good to know that Baby 59 is safe. It’s a miracle he survived being trapped in a toilet pipe. Good thing somebody heard him crying. The angels must have protected him from harm. His mother must be nuts. How can she just throw away an angel as cute as that? She could just given him to a childless couple or an orphanage. Oh well, if women from that part of the planet flush away their unwanted babies, we do it differently here. Fetuses are thrown just everywhere. Where is morality and where is their humanity?

In the mind of an unwed or unprepared mother, it is better to abort the child than continue with the pregnancy and live with the stigma of being an unwed mother. In their minds, it is better to abort the pregnancy and take a rest for two weeks than continue with the pregnancy and take the full responsibility of raising a child. Aborting a baby would probably take PhP10,000 as compared to raising one.

In the mind of an unwed or unprepared mother, their family comes first: her parents’ reaction and disapproval, her family’s capability to raise a child, her family’s comfort and later on: the society’s perception, the government’s reaction. Very little concern is left for the unborn child.

Sex is easy, life is cheap. Motherhood does not knock at every women’s door; it’s unfair for some women to be denied the opportunity to be a mother while some are wasting their chance at motherhood. Truly, we can’t choose our parents.

If you are not ready for motherhood, then please be responsible! If you can’t wait for sex after marriage, then please practice safe sex! Once a life inside of you is made, there is no turning back. You don’t dump human beings like that (fetus in a bottle), even dogs deserve a decent burial at the backyard!

(http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2331941/Chinese-baby-rescued-ALIVE-toilet-pipe-flushed-away-parents.html?ITO=socialnet-googleplus-dailymail)