The World of Second Chances

Find The Culprit

January 2, 2013

Life & Love

Stephanie Ella’s condition is still critical as of this writing. Stephanie is the seven-year old stray bullet victim from Malaria, Caloocan City. The young girl was just standing outside of their house, watching fireworks when she was hit by a stray bullet. Again, she is only seven years old. The person who fired his/her gun to greet 2013 maybe 27, 37, 47, 57, 67 and so on. My point is, that stray bullet harmed an innocent young girl who is not even half of the culprit’s age.

Why do some people have to fire guns to welcome the New Year, anyway? Yabang na lang ba? I am talking of 20 stray bullet incidents here. Twenty! Some of the victims were luckily hit on not so delicate areas but what about the three year old boy from Baliuag and Stephanie Ella from Caloocan? The 3-year old survived the incident and is now declared out of danger. Stephanie is still in comatose, fighting for her life.

One PNP official said that finding the trajectory of the bullet is difficult but possible. Stephanie and the rest of the stray bullet victims may not be important people in our society but they deserve justice just the same. Let’s give it a try to find out who did it. There’s a way to compute for the trajectory of the bullet; leave it to our Math and Physics experts to do that. Science may solve this crime but first hand witnesses can solve it faster. For sure, the family, relatives and friends of those who fired their guns will think twice or even thrice to question if the culprit is the one who celebrated with them. In the case of Stephanie, somebody from Caloocan, Quezon City and Bulacan area must be the culprit.
KFC Commercial

December 21, 2012

Wedding & Family Life

I can’t help but shed a tear every time I watch Sid Lucero’s KFC commercial about siblings who can’t get along with each other. Sid’s role is that of the eldest child who’s probably the family’s breadwinner or maybe the one in-charge of the household in the absence of their father who’s not seen on the commercial. The second child, perhaps a college girl, asks for her kuya’s permission if she could use his car. The kuya (Sid) reacts negatively and even scolds their youngest sibling about forgetting to power off his computer. The siblings are busy reacting to each other’s concerns; unaware of their mother’s walking out of their house. When the siblings realize that they might have offended their mother with their bickering, they look out for her. While inside Sid’s car, they pass along familiar places with childhood and teenage memories. There were happy memories and sad memories but nevertheless, they stuck together as a family. Perhaps, as years went by, they got too busy with their personal lives so they failed to remember the good times they had with each other. Perhaps, as they grew older, their personal problems became complicated; maybe more bills to pay, relationship problems, career problems.

My siblings and I don’t have that kind of petty quarrels anymore but I can relate with the commercial in some ways. Like, every time I get the chance to visit my hometown, Balanga City, there’s always that nostalgic moment. The big difference with the commercial, of course, is that, my mother will no longer be around at the end of the story to provide a happy ending. Not that my life now without my mother is empty and unhappy but losing my mother brought a permanent scar in my heart.

Unlike the other KFC commercial about a mother feeling insecure (?) about her two teenage son’s coming of age and bringing home their girlfriends for a getting-to-know-you dinner, Sid’s commercial is more touching because it hits the nostalgic spot of a typical sibling or child. And what is more touching for a mother than to see your children in unity. Ten, twenty years from now, my children will have their own lives. It is every parent’s dream to have loving and caring children; one who looks out for each other. That’s the message of the KFC commercial and I love it!
In The Eyes of the Frenemy

November 17, 2012

Life & Love

Note: Know your frenemy. Stay away from your frenemy. Do not trust your frenemy.

“I never intend to end your life this way. We were close, we may not be sisters by blood but we were sisters by heart. I introduced you to my glamorous world, my world that was the complete opposite of your world. You wanted to get out of poverty. You wanted to continue schooling. You wanted to taste my glamorous life and I became your mentor to it. You were my protégé. I taught you how to dress yourself fashionably. I even handed down some of my nice clothes to you. You were the sister that I never had.

Our vacations together were full of happy memories. Men couldn’t help but swoon at our beauty. Women hated us for our curvaceous body. People had a hard time on choosing who between us was prettier. I wanted them to say it was me. After all, I was more sophisticated than you. I’ve known the ins and outs of this cruel world more than you do.

You always knew that our profession is judged not just by our beauty but also by our image. You knew about my kids, of course you had to know it. You were my sister by heart. You knew about my kids and how I wanted to keep them out of my professional life. I was once a girlfriend of the month on a popular men’s magazine. I was making good money. I was living a charmed life until you irresponsibly mentioned about my having children out of wedlock. You knew it could affect my image. You knew it could affect my income. You knew it could affect my career. And there was you: young, promising, a ripening beauty right before my eyes.

I wanted to teach you a lesson. A lesson that you would never forget. I hated you so much for ruining my image but I felt compelled to save this little friendship out of our good past. But I couldn’t let this anger inside of me to cool down.

Our popcorn at the cinema was bitter to my taste. Was it my pent up emotions that were affecting my taste buds? Or was it the uneasiness of thinking that an hour from now, you would learn the hardest lesson in your life?

You were a real beauty even in the dark. I couldn’t follow the story of the movie that we were watching. I was too busy thinking about what would happen in the next few minutes. You were sitting beside me, sharing a popcorn with me. We should be rejoicing over our reconciliation, you promised to be more careful about what you tell people about me.

Should I call my lover to tell him to proceed with the plan? Or should I consider this reconciliation to be genuine and forget about what you did? You were my sister by heart. You need to be taught a lesson. You had a promising career while mine was backsliding. How could you do this to me?

The movie was over and I told you that we would be meeting somebody in position. A power that be who could help you become famous. Your little ambition to be famous was the bait that led you to the dungeon. How I managed to think of how to react to your abduction was clever. A motorist saw me and reported me to the authority. That was the best alibi and now I could go home.

I could go home and look forward to another day. My lover’s men will take care of you. My lover knew how to do things fast and efficient. I could look forward to tomorrow and anticipate a call or text from you asking me to go to your place for comfort. You were by sister by heart.

I uploaded our happy photos the moment I learned about your demise. Killing you was not part of the deal, I promise. You were my sister by heart. I went into hiding, confused about the whole thing. I lost a sister and that was sad.

Now, I have to deal with all of this brouhaha alone. The people hate me, my family is ashamed of me. You created this whole mess and I should have given you a hard slap instead of involving my lover.”
Birthday Realizations

October 30, 2012

Life & Love

I celebrated my birthday this month sans the extravagance that people under my zodiac are inclined to. I decided to take the road to frugality some two months ago. Surprisingly, what I thought would be difficult for me to take was easy, a piece of cake! I was able to control my unplanned shopping by delaying the things that I wanted to buy at that moment. I realized that most of the items at our house were bought on impulse.

My friend influenced me to read and learn about investing and passive money-making. The additional year on my age simply aligns with this new endeavour; I’m past the stage of reading every details about my favourite celebrity.

I have learned to forgive and forget. I have learned to give up some dreams, mostly personal ones. I have learned to be more responsible as a person, as a wife, as a mother, as a daughter, as a sister and as a friend. I have learned to move on from every mistakes. Those mistakes humbled me and pushed me to be a better me.
Ang Kayumanggi at si Lucy Liu

October 19, 2012

Life & Love

Nagbabalat-sibuyas na naman daw ang mga Pilipino sa “racist” remark ni Lucy Liu sa show ni David Letterman kung saan nya sinabing hindi sya pwedeng mababad sa araw at kung hindi ay magmumukha syang Pilipino. Maitim, kayumanggi- yan ang pagiging Pilipino sa isip ng ibang lahi at kahit pa ng mismong kalahi na natin. Ang tanong, sino ba ang mas nagbalat-sibuyas, ang mga Pilipinong narito sa Pinas o ang mga Pilipinong naroon na sa ibayong-dagat. Bakit ko nasabi? Mas matindi kasi ang pressure para sa mga Pinoy na nasa abroard pagdating sa pagtanggap sa kanila ng lipunan kung kaya’t nagiging sensitibo sila sa mga diskriminasyon at pag-aaglahi. Kung ang Pinoy na nakabasa, nakapanood o nakapakinig ng sinabi na yun ni Lucy Liu ay naririto lamang sa Pilipinas, pihadong ang reaksyon lamang ay, “Lucy Liu, our local version of Pokwang!” Tatawanan lamang si Lucy at patuloy lang ang buhay.

Napakabalat-sibuyas naman ng ibang Pilipino samantalang tayo rin naman, kung makapintas sa ibang lahi ay ganun na lang. Kinarma nga yata tayo dahil sa pag-discriminate ng mga ninuno natin sa mga Intsik noong panahon ng Kastila. Look at where China is right now, isa nang superpower. Kinarma din yata tayo sa pag-discriminate sa mga Bumbay dahil sa pagpa-five six nila at pagtitinda ng kung anu-ano. Eh sino ba ang kinikilala ngayong IT expert, hindi ba’t India?

Mismong mga kapatid nating Aeta at katutubo, ginagawang butt of jokes ng ilang magagaling na Pilipino pero isang statement lang na malamang ay na-misinterpret natin mula kay Lucy Liu, galit na galit na ang ibang Pinoy?

Sige nga, kung proud ka sa kayumanggi color mo, itigil mo ang papaya soap at glutathione mo. Itigil mo ang pagkukulay ng blonde at pagsusuot ng colored lens. Itigil mo ang pa-slang slang mo kasi hindi ikaw yun. In short, embrace your ethinicity.

Baligtarin natin ang sitwasyon. Paano kung si Mercedes Cabral na isang kayumanggi beauty ang nagsabing “Hindi ako gumagamit ng whitening products kasi magmumukha naman akong puti, ano!” Mao-offend kaya ang mga puti? Hindi dahil sa konseptong ang pagiging puti o maputi ay ang dapat o ang standard. Maninipis ang maiitim o kayumanggi sa mga pahayag ng diskriminasyon kuno o pati sa paggamit ng salitang Filipino ng isang brand ng biskwit dahil sa isip-isip ng ibang affected na Pinoy, substandard kasi ang pagiging kayumanggi.
All Brides Are Beautiful!

October 19, 2012

Wedding & Family Life

My husband, Adi and I will be attending a friend’s wedding in Balanga City tomorrow. Oh, I’m excited to see the bride; she was one of my bride’s maids and her soon-to-be husband was one of the groom’s men. Their love story didn’t start at my wedding because they were already lovers when we got them to be part of our entourage.

Weddings are elegant no matter how simple some of them are. The bride always exudes an air of aristocracy; her beauty shines through her smile. The groom’s facial expression denotes pride and excitement. The bride’s maids, groom’s men, maid of honor and best man look at the soon-to-be husband and wife with unexplainable joy and admiration. The parents of the couple have both tears and smile on their face as if they can’t decide whether to give away their son or daughter to their soon-to-be daughter or son-in-law.

My own wedding was not perfect. Months before the wedding, there were some family problems to face. My then-boyfriend and I were too harassed by the preparation. There were only me and him who prepared for our wedding. When the modista took my measurement in December 2008, I was fat and she suggested to put some allowance on the gown in case I grew bigger before the wedding. When the gown was delivered in February and I tried on it, I noticed that it was a little loose on the torso. I disregarded the loose fitting; I didn’t realize that I’ve lost a lot of weight in just two months. When I wore the gown on my wedding day or five weeks after I tried on it, it was very loose! I lost a lot of weight and it showed on the gown. It was very uncomfortable to always check on my gown for any wardrobe malfunction while my father and I were marching down the aisle.

Frankly, I have not yet watched our wedding video and the wedding gown was just stored at its box sans dry cleaning. Up to this time, it’s hard to see my ailing mother on video. She died two months after the wedding. As for the wedding gown, it was certainly a wise decision to have a cheaper gown made by an unknown yet skilful modista. I have nothing against blushing brides opting to get the services of famous gown designers if they have money to burn. But if the budget is tight or in my case, if the bride is just being practical, then the work of an unknown yet skilful modista will do.

We spent more on the reception and miscalculated the number of guests at 200 when only 110 guests arrived. Heck, I can’t even remember our caterer’s food!

My wedding was not perfect and I got married to an imperfect person. At this stage when our honeymoon phase is over and reality is knocking on our head, I question my decision of marrying someone after a whirlwind romance. We have no past to share and his life 25 years before is a door that needs to be opened. Maybe I made a big mistake of getting engaged just two months after we started dating. But that big mistake brought me my greatest joys in life, Adi and Robi.
Success Story

October 19, 2012

Career, Finance & Product

I came across this article (http://moneysense.com.ph/success-stories/building-through-moving/) in my earnest effort to learn about entrepreneurship and financial management. There was a time when my husband and I invested our savings into chicharon business but decided to fold up when we realized that we were just having a break-even. Our manufacturing overhead cost went above the budget due to lack of reliable workers. We were forced to hire more workers because the skilful ones were either absent or slowing down. To make the situation worse, our major raw material (imported pork skin) was out-of-stock for nearly one month due to the holiday season (Christmas and New Year); our suppliers said that shipping companies usually prioritize other cargoes during this season.

Our first entrepreneurial venture was just a break-even; neither a success nor a failure. If there was one thing that I learned in there, it was the value of hiring the right people for the job. Surely, one would say that not everybody has an eye for business. Well, having a good business is a combination of hard work, proper timing and luck. Mr. Paulo Tibig’s article about his humble beginnings as a promdi who dreamed it big in Manila is an example. He and Abby first put up a laundry shop but for some reasons, gave it up. Had they stopped at that point and continued on their corporate jobs, they wouldn’t put up the logistics/forwarding business that they have right now.

Paulo’s entrepreneurial skills cannot be questioned because he came from a family of entrepreneurs. The first time that I heard about Abby and her then-boyfriend putting up a laundry shop in Manila, I was surprised to know that Abby has become interested in entrepreneurship. Not that Abby is incapable or not smart enough but from what I knew, her family was never into business and entrepreneurship. Paulo must have rubbed off his business sense on Abby!

It feels good to read success stories especially if I know the persons involved (in this case, Abby). They spark a desire on me to live each day like a big challenge.