The World of Second Chances

The Love As I View It Five Years Ago

June 18, 2010

Life & Love

Why is loving so difficult to do?
Because to love is to risk not being loved in return.
Because to love is to risk not being treated the way we want to be treated.
Because love is to risk being hurt, being rejected, being disillusioned.

How many years will you have to wait before you let go of a person?
Some people easily let go of a person once they sense that the relationship
won’t work.
Some people continue to hold on for years until they realize that he’s/she’s not
the person she’d/he’d like to be with
for the rest of her/his life.
Some people hope that things will be better until he/she realize that he/she
spent a lifetime of pain and
emotional suffering to his/her partner.

Love is a two-way process but there is no such thing as equality in love.
If you can measure its equality, then, it is not love. You will just have to
feel that somebody
in the relationship is more on the giving or receiving end without necessarily
measuring love per se.

There is no such thing as an ideal relationship because there is no perfect
person or perfect set up.
The best thing that we can do is just to take the person as he/she is and to
take the set up as it is.
But love should never be the sole reason to keep on understanding a partner’s
shortcomings.
It is not healthy for the couple to keep on staying on a one-sided relationship.
Understanding is only applicable to a partner who is willing to compromise.
Meet half-ways. Don’t be a martyr in love just because you have so much love to
give.
If you tolerate his/her annoying actions, you contribute more to his/her
immaturity.

Love is not about choosing who over whom or choosing who over what.
In love, security is always a factor to keep you from holding on.
Lack of security leads to doubt. Doubt leads to lack of trust.
Lack of trust leads to lack of security and the cycle continues.
Both of you must know where to stand in a relationship. Don’t play mind games;
call a spade a spade
because a spade could never be an ace.

Nobody knows the future. Not even the stars or the oracle. The future is like a
running water
with no direction or form. Why do you have to think about the future when the
present is more important?
People are too worried about the future. They are worried about how many bucks
they’re going to make by
the time they are 30. They are worried about when to marry or when to have a
child.They are worried about the superficialities of life.
People can be so intelligent yet so dumb. The present is the preparation towards
the future.
So many lovers prepare too much for the future, neglecting their partner’s
feelings and emotional needs,
only to realize that they are losing them as days pass by.

To be able to love, one must love himself/herself first. You will never know how
it feels to be in pain, in jealousy, in love, in sympathy
unless you yourself have experienced it. Don’t confuse love with infatuation or
need. If you’re just physically attracted to a person
but you can’t be with him/her in times of need; it must be infatuation. If you
can’t let go of a person because you can’t live without
that person; it must be a need. Don’t fall in love just for the sake of falling
in love. Don’t enter into a relationship just because of a need
for companionship. Don’t get married just because you’re getting late for the
last trip. These needs, once fulfilled, will do more harm than good
to both of you. Have you tried lusting over a bar of expensive chocolate? Once
you tasted it and get tired of it, you won’t bother to eat the whole
bar. Point is, it is always tempting to get something or somebody that you know
you wouldn’t have. Countermeasure? Don’t fall in love,
get married and have kids for the wrong reasons.
Building Up My Baby’s Vocabulary

June 18, 2010

Wedding & Family Life

At 9 months and two weeks, Adi can utter the following words:

dog- which he pronounce as “do”, it’s like removing the “g” from the word
cat- “cat”
triangle- “tie-duh”
mama-“mama”
papa-“papa”
daddy-“deh”
Ate (elder sister)-“teh”
moon-“moon”
star-“tah”
yum-yum-“mum-mum”
And the list goes on.

I think it’s best for my little one to learn the King’s language at an early age. My husband and I communicates with him in English and Tagalog. My husband’s dialect is Cebuano; we might as well introduce the dialect to him. Oh, well…I need to learn Cebuano, too. He teaches me basic Cebuano but I always end up speaking Ilocano, my second dialect after my native Tagalog.

I’ve always wanted to learn and speak at least four different languages but the limitation is I don’t get to speak with native speakers of the languages that I am trying to learn. Maybe Adi’s case will be different because young children learn faster than adults.
Are You Chummy With Your In-Laws?

June 17, 2010

Wedding & Family Life

I grew up witnessing how my aunt (my father’s second sister) and my mother got along well with each other. My grandparents from the father side adored my mother, too. I felt so special whenever me and my brother were with them.

My father’s relationship with my mother’s relatives was just civil, except for his relationship with my aunt (my mother’s first cousin). She was the only person in my mother’s family that he got along well with.

I hated that civilness between my father and my relatives from the mother side. I wished that the relationship was closer and warmer. My father had this attitude of keeping grudges. Being my grandmother’s (my mother’s mother) favorite grandchild, I felt that it was unfair to my lola for my father to think of her that way.

I am close to my brother’s common law wife. She is like my sister. We text each other almost everyday to keep each other updated. Their daughter is my only niece—oh, my favorite niece!

My husband’s family is not the type who reaches out to relatives. Don’t get me wrong, they are nice and decent people but reaching out is just alien to them. I respect my father-in-law but I cannot say that I’m close to him. My two sisters-in-law seem distant and unreachable. I used to be chummy with one of their brothers but he stopped communicating with us when he started to have a family.

Some would say that I am lucky for not having in-laws to meddle in our family life. I pine for a mother-in-law…wait, a good mother-in-law! My husband’s mother passed away when he was young. It’s good to have in-laws if they’re generous and easy to get along with.

Are you chummy with your in-laws?
I Am Not A Good “SPORTS” ;p

June 11, 2010

Life & Love

http://kaasikid.blogspot.com/2010/06/mga-sports-na-dapat-pag-aralan.html

I can’t really say that I love sports so to the sports enthusiasts, bear with my comments on Kaasikid’s post. (see the link above)

1) basketball – for sure me pa liga sa barangay, skul or company nyo. andami din basketball court sa bawat kanto ng pinas. madami din umiidolo kay jordan, kobe bryant, lebron at iba pang nba star. sa pinas me pba at pbl at sa uaap/ncaa super sikat ang basketball. exciting panoorin ang basketball. ang basketball player malaki sahod. d best cguro bata palang ienrol na sa milo basketball clinic pag summer.
Iris says: Funny but the basketball players that I know of are Alvin Patrimonio, Robert Jaworski, Jerry Codiñera and Bong Alvarez. I wouldn’t be aware that there’s a James Yap if not for Kris Aquino, Marc Pingris if not for Danica Sotto and Rommel Adducul who happened to be Assunta de Rossi’s ex-bf. While most of my officemates are hoping that they’ll be given free tickets to watch the basketball game in Araneta (our company is one of the sponsors), I am hoping that I’ll be given at least discount cards to Belo or Calayan. Lol! I had a chance encounter with Alvin Patrimonio in Subic Duty Free when he was promoting Nike shoes there. That was in 2002 or 2003. I wouldn’t notice that he was Alvin if not for the other customers who said it was him.

2) volleyball – magagamit mo to sa beach. ang pinas ay 7107 islands. high tide or low tide. saka ung mundo majority napapaligiran ng tubig so marami din beach. minsan naman cguro sa buhay mo pupunta ka sa beach. iba di ba ung dating pag astig ka sa beach volleyball.
Iris says: I was in 6th grade when out of the blue, I decided to be part of the district volleyball team. There was a try out and I informed my supposed team mates that I would be available every afternoon for the practice. They never bothered to tell me where they were practicing. I practiced alone and noticed that the sport was not really for me. I didn’t have strong arms and the ball bruised my arms.

3) billiards – eto eh larong pang tambay daw. siguro dati un pero ngaun isa to sa ok na hobby. magagamit mo naman to pag tumambay kau sa gimikan. usually me billiard table. kung gusto mo kumita pwede ka rin makipagpustahan. bakit hindi na lang dart? ano ba ung astig? me dala kang tako na para kang ninja na me nakasukbit na samurai blade or me parang maliit na makeup kit na dala?
Iris says: Billiards was my pastime in college. I was the only girl in a company of engineering boys who were very much willing to teach me the do’s and don’ts of the game.

4) chess – eto eh more on mental focus and strategy. mahahasa utak mo sa pag diskarte. so kahit mahina katawan mo kaya mo naman siguro pagalawin ung pyesa. magagamit mo din to pag nag aantay ka sa barberya at pwede ka mag miron. wag ka lang sasali dun sa nagsosolb ng chess puzzle tapos me taya. mga scammer un. bakit hindi dama? gusto mo ba maglaro na tansan or takip ng bote ang pyesa?
Iris says: My youngest brother beat me at this when he was six years old. My first crush in high school was a champion at it. I admire people who are good in chess.

eto na siguro ung 4 basics na pinaka ok na setting sa pinas, me mas dating at less gastos kesa sa ibang sports.
bakit walang karate or martial arts eh magagamit mo to para pagtanggol mo sarili mo. una baka sa sobrang tapang mo dahil marunong ka martial arts naholdap ka lumaban ka, me kasama pa palang me sumpit. eh di yari ka. pag hinoldap ka ibigay mo na lang. kung gusto mo talaga ng protection magdala ka ng baril tapos pag hinoldap ka putukan mo ung isa tatakbo na ung iba pero habulin mo at putukan din.
Iris says: I used to carry a small balisong when I was in Gapo. Proteksyon lang. Kaso nung mapadaan ako sa metal detector sa Wistron, katakot-takot na paliwanag bakit may balisong ako sa bulsa ng pants. Hehehehe….
Admitting Our Mistakes

June 10, 2010

Career, Finance & Product

I admit my mistakes, do you?

It isn’t fatal to admit your mistakes so why are you so defensive?

It’s just work! The bosses will understand if we did some typo errors or let’s say, STUPID error!

Don’t consume your time blaming others! Especially if that person is admitting her mistake!

Grow up, boy!
The Restroom is My Spa

June 10, 2010

Wedding & Family Life

I barely have time to go to the spa to have a much needed aromatherapy back scrub or facial so I decided that I’ll bring at least my facial mask to the office. Being a mom (and wife) consumes much of my time at home; there’s no break for that. At the office, I take advantage of the 60-minute breaktime to go to the restroom and apply my beauty creams and mask while self-massaging my scalp. I started this routine last Monday. Believe me, it helps in decreasing my stress level at work. It’s also good to have officemates who are vain; they’ll understand why I need to do this routine.

I have every reason to stay attractive in the eyes of my husband. First, it’s a wife’s obligation to stay attractive. Second, Miel is five years my junior. Pangit naman if he looks like my kid brother instead of my husband, no!
How To Be Handsome?

June 8, 2010

Career, Finance & Product

http://kaasikid.blogspot.com/2010/06/pano-gumawapo-or-pumogi.html

Take a look at the link above. Don’t you think that I need to answer that or at least have my own version of that?

1) Maligo – gumamit ng safeguard professional clean
Iris says: Kaasikid, that Safeguard is correlated to being a family soap. If you want to smell shower fresh, then buy some musky-scented soap. I would even recommend Dial instead of Safeguard.
2) Magsipilyo – gumamit ng colgate professional clean
Iris says: Colgate, just like Safeguard, is a family toothpaste. Try something different like Aquafresh.
3) Mag cologne/pabango – ung light lang ang dating at hindi amoy tanders. wag mag axe common na to.
Iris says: I so agree that Axe is overrated. I would even pick Afficionado over it. I had a highschool classmate who wore Drakkar Noir. I wonder why this perfume is not so popular here when it’s the most masculine-smelling scent for me.
4) Magdamit ng maayos – di kelangan branded. basta malinis, plantsado at bagay sau. ung presentable. wag ka na magdark colors kung maitim ka na.
Iris says: Agree. Light colors complement dark skin. I love men who wear yellow. Light-skinned men, I mean. I am never impressed with people who wear signature clothes. I am impressed with people who wear well-pressed clothes. (Because I rarely iron my clothes! Lol!)
5) Magpagupit ng clean cut – oo cool ang long hair pero me mukhang mabaho. clean cut para malinis tingnan at mukhang mabango
Iris says: Long hair is okay as long as the guy keeps it in a pony tail. I also admire skinheads.
6) Mag ahit – oo cool din ang me bigote.pero mas bata kang tingnan at mas malinis pag bagong ahit. kaya nga me sinasabing ahit pogi.
Iris says: A little masculinity is what I want so I don’t prefer men who shave. But I don’t prefer bearded guys, too. A little goatee will do. 😉
7) Magsuot ng relo – para on time ka parati. simpleng relo lang na metal or leather watch na bagay sa getup. wag ka mag accessories ng iba like hikaw kwintas or singsing.
Iris says: I love men who wear earrings!
8) Magsuot ng maayos na sapatos – kung leather i shine. wag naman kintab sekyu. ung tama lang. kung sneakers basta malinis tingnan. hindi ung tipong pang rocker or emo na madumi or me putik.
Iris says: I love men who wear clean shoes!