The World of Second Chances

Cake, Ice Cream and Balloons

April 1, 2013

Wedding & Family Life

Would you like one?

As a child, I was fond of attending birthday parties. I looked forward to attending my classmates’ birthday celebration and my most memorable ones were Michelle’s, Shellah’s and Tammy’s birthday. The idea of a birthday celebration used to center on three things: cake, ice cream and balloons; without this combination, it didn’t feel like a birthday celebration after all.

My youngest child would celebrate his first birthday on April 3rd. We wanted to avoid the hassles of preparation so we decided to have a Jollibee party (http://jollibeeparty.com/) for Robi. The downside of the Jollibee party is its limited seating capacity at a maximum of 100 guests so we just invited some neighbours and officemates with their kids.

I didn’t make use of the online reservation because I preferred a site visit and a personal talk with the smart-on-duty. The site was helpful to check if I could afford the budget of holding a party in Jollibee. Since I’m practicing frugal living since the start of the year, I decided not to get everything that was suggested by the smart-on-duty. I didn’t find the party hat useful and cute so I excluded it on the party package. The paper placemat was not really eye-catching so I excluded it, too. I’m still thinking if everyone needs a nametag; otherwise, I will ask the smart-on-duty to provide nametags for us. I would love to prepare the loot bags but there’s a big possibility that I would ask the smart-on-duty to include them on my package.

Cake, ice cream and balloons—these are the main components of a birthday party. Kids don’t care about the tarpaulin and sounds and the party host. Kids love hotdogs with marshmallows, the games and a lot of candies. Kids don’t care about the price of the gift; being in the company of one another is enough for them. Sometimes, I wonder if I’m celebrating my kids’ birthday because I want to make them happy or I want to make other people happy. Of course, my honest realization is BOTH: I want to make my kids happy and as well as the other kids (visitors), too. But as an adult, I tend to lack the simplicity of a kid’s happiness like missing out what matters to them most- JUST BEING HAPPY. Enjoy Robi’s simple party, kids!
Santa Cena 2013

March 25, 2013

Life & Love

the one who died for us

We have just celebrated the 2013 Santa Cena in our locale. It was my most emotional Santa Cena since I became a member of the Iglesia ni Cristo in 2009. The minister’s text about the suffering of the Lord Jesus Christ made me cry a river!

In the first place, Jesus was accused of a crime that was obviously a planted one. If you were accused of something bad that you did not commit, your initial reaction would probably be to attack your accuser or to sue him of libel. But Jesus accepted his fate and kept his promise of saving us from our sins. What goodness have we done to deserve such act of kindness from Jesus?

The political system during the Roman Empire was a great disadvantage to Jesus. Pontius Pilate, the ONLY person who could have saved him, washed his hands to avoid any involvement in Jesus’s case. Isn’t it the same to what is happening in our current political systems when some politicians simply do not have the BALLS to stand up for what is right and condemn anything that is wrong? To add insult to injury, the criminal Barabas was released instead of Jesus Christ. It must be a case of vote-buying, heh? Again, what goodness have we done to deserve such act of kindness from Jesus?

Jesus was no John Cena to endure all the paddling. He was beaten from head to toe. Literally, “mata nya lang ang walang latay!” Did he curse those who beat him? Nah! Those bastards were not happy to see him still standing after the paddling, they placed a crown made of thorns! Blood was oozing over his face, the bastards were rejoicing at the sight. Have you eaten a crab? Have you experienced being pricked by it? Ansakit di ba? What goodness have we done to deserve such act of kindness from Jesus?

They were not contented, they ASKED Jesus to walk his way to Golgotha with that heavy cross. When Peter saw him, he denied him not once, not twice but thrice! Ouchhh! Parang kailan lang, they were together preaching but now his good friend was denying him. What goodness have we done to deserve such act of kindness from Jesus?

Joseph (the strong muscular one) helped him carry his cross not out of pity but out of fear. It was a temporary relief for Jesus Christ to have someone carry his load. But Joseph helped him because the guards obliged him to do so. There is no difference to us when we just go to church just because the minister would send a deacon to us if we missed a worship. Are we really going to church to hear God’s message through our minister or is it because we don’t want to offend our spouse or the minister for missing a worship? Are we physically, mentally and emotionally present during our times of worship? What goodness have we done to deserve such act of kindess from Jesus?

Finally, Jesus was nailed on the cross. Are you afraid of getting flu shots because of the injection? Heck, it’s just a tiny piece of metal! It’s nothing as compared to the nails used on Jesus. Jesus was being ridiculed from the time he was presented to Pontius Pilate up to the time he was nailed on the cross.

“I thirst.”

What did they give? Mineral water? Soda? Juice? Nah! They gave him water from the sponge dipped in vinegar. Yuck! Chris was dying na nga, ganun pa ibibigay? Tell me how barbaric these people were. Mabuti pa ang sini-silya elektrika, pwedeng humiling ng lechon, ano! Again, what have we done to deserve Christ’s sufferings for us?

Jesus died on the cross. On the third day, he was resurrected. Jesus died for our sins. Jesus redeemed the world. But what have we done to acknowledge all his sacrifices? Ah, meron naman.

We go to church but are never serious about the gospel.
We are too proud and won’t admit our sins.
We lust after money, power and our neighbor’s wife/husband.
We betray our friends.
We kill the unborn.
We cheat the people.
We hate the poor.
We hate each other.
We don’t care about each other.
Etc…etc…
What goodness have we done to deserve Jesus’s act of kindness for all of us?
My House Hunting Journey

March 18, 2013

Wedding & Family Life

Bahay kubo kahit munti

A house is not an investment as per Robert Kiyosaki and Fitz Villafuerte. It will only become an investment if it will generate income. Yeah, right. But I still want to own a house! A house is my nest and if owning a car is every men’s dream, then owning a house is every women’s desire.

Contrary to popular perception, owning a house through PAGIBIG is not a cheap scheme unless we’re talking of a rowhouse with a floor area of 35 sqm. Developers charge differently depending on the location of the housing project and materials used (BOM). A 100 sqm house and lot in a less accessible area can cost PhP800,000 whereas a 50 sqm rowhouse near the commercial district can cost the same. This is low-cost housing or rather, standard housing project.

My husband and I have just started house hunting and tripping last month and I realize that it can be stressful at times. The cost of paying a 20% downpayment can be stressful specially if I really like the unit but I need to “give it up” to scout for more affordable ones. The most affordable unit is a rowhouse which looks good in the inside but looks like an ordinary apartment on the outside. Rowhouses range from PhP600K-800K with 20% downpayment payable in 12 to 18 months. Owners can put up a fence to secure the front yard and the small backyard but if living with a neighbor with close proximity is an issue, then rowhouse is not the right house for you. Personally, I have no issue with buying a rowhouse except the size factor. Ordinary rowhouses range from 35-40 sqm only and for a family of 5 + 1 maid, this is not ideal for me.

Townhouse is the better version of a rowhouse. The size of an average townhouse ranges from 45-70 sqm with 2-3 bedrooms. The materials used could be the same with the rowhouse but the finishing touches are definitely better. I’m okay with the 3 bedroom townhouse but the total contract price by the developer is around PhP1.7M. That price can afford me to buy a second-hand house here in the countryside.

Second hand or housing project?
The only hassle that I see in buying a second-hand house is the whole process of applying for a PAGIBIG loan. In housing projects, the developer take care of the PAGIBIG requirements and it’s a big relief for busy individuals like me. Old houses that has no or little market value and need repair should cost lesser than that of the ready for occupancy second-hand houses.

To construct or to buy?
The cost of constructing a house in the Philippines is roughly computed at PhP17K to PhP25K per sqm. Average cost of lot in the countryside ranges from PhP1500 to PhP7000 per sqm depending on the location. The good thing in constructing your own home is it’s customized according to the owner’s preference and taste. The bad thing is the construction takes time (from 4-12 months depending on the budget) and the owner has to visit the construction site if he wants to check if the the project is being carried out in time.

We are still on the early phases of house-hunting and these are our guidelines:
1. Location- close to medium proximity to school since we have two young kids
2. Price- Affordable housing that will not strip us of our goal to save for retirement and the rainy days
3. Saleability-The property’s saleability in case we decide to move or retire in our province in the future
4. Neighborhood- I would prefer a neighborhood with familiar faces like churchmates and officemates around.
Family Over Career

March 13, 2013

Wedding & Family Life

“Where have you been all day, Mama?”

The bosses asked for an emergency meeting at 4PM today. Good thing, we ended just in time before 5PM. While taking our snack, they talked about a colleague from the sister company who has stage 4 brain cancer. The bosses are in their late 50’s so it must be difficult to see a contemporay on a difficult health situation.

One of the VP’s (Vice President) shared a story about a busy man who holds a corporate job. The man goes to the attic to pick up his young son’s old journal. By chance, he is able to retrieve his own journal. He has forgotten about that old journal and is delighted to retrieve it from the storage area.

He reads one of his entries, “March 13, 2012, went fishing with my son. No catch! Just wasted my day!”

He is a busy man. If he used that day to finish some report, then that would have been a better output than bringing home an empty basket.

Curious, the man proceeds to read his son’s entry for March 13, 2012. It says,” March 13, 2012. What a great day with dad! No catch but who cares? I’m with my dad!”

***********************************

Everybody was dumbfounded at the boardroom. Everyone in the meeting is guilty of sacrificing our quality time with the family for work. Tears were beginning to build up on my eyes when another boss stood up and adjourned the meeting. Saved by the bell.

I am guilty of not giving my quality and quantity time for my family. This is an eye-opener for me that at the end of the day, family is more important than career or work. Now I know why my kids react that way whenever we (their parents) are around. Nagpapapansin.

From now on, I will have more time for my family. I will listen more, play with them more, nurture them more. After all, nobody would probably say on their deathbed that they love their job or career. It would always be, “I love you, my family.”
Beware of Budol Budol Gang

March 12, 2013

Life & Love

Cavite is on the spotlight nowadays not because of some good news but because of the alarming incidents of robbery with murder allegedly committed by members of the Budol Budol gang. What is more nerve-wracking is that the victims are senior citizens! Yes, helpless senior citizens who are in the twilight of their life. The gang takes advantage of the victims physical helplessness and memory deterioration to push through with their evil plans.

Particular targets are senior citizens who are alone in the market or grocery and wearing jewelries or carrying cash. We are not talking about victimizing senior citizens with diamond earrings and 24-K gold bracelets in here; the gang takes whatever valuable piece of jewelry the victim has. We are not talking here about bags of money because even market or grocery money are being targetted.

The gang takes advantage of the victim’s deteriorating memory and acts as if they’ve known each other from somewhere. The victim, being old and having memory lapses, becomes trustful of the strangers and agrees to go with them.

Typical modus operandi of Budol Budol Gang as reported in the news:

1. The Balikbayan style- one member will approach the victim and pretend to be an old friend’s son or daughter. The Budol member will invite the victim to go to their house to get his pasalubong. If the Budol member is “kind” enough, he will just dupe the old victim with fake money (also known as switching of the victim’s real money vs. the Budol’s fake money or just bunch of papers) If the Budol member is evil enough, he will take the victim to an isolated area, rob him/her and then kill him/her.

2. Market/Grocery Lookout- A Budol member will follow an unsuspecting victim while looking for goods/food at the grocery or market. The Budol member will notify another member if the victim has large cash on his/her wallet or bag. Once done with the marketing or grocery and while waiting for a tricycle or taxi, another member, usually a middle-aged woman will approach the victim and pretend that they are old friends. The Budol member will take a hitch on the taxi while two or three members are waiting at strategic locations to join them at the street corner. The victim will then be taken to an isolated area and rob him/her and then kill him/her.
The Sabah Issue

March 9, 2013

Life & Love

Sultan of Sulu

When I first heard the news about the Sabah “invasion” by Sultan Jamalul Kiram III, I did not take it seriously. The last time that I heard about the Sabah claim was in the 80’s when I was too young to involve myself into my country’s political and social issues.
I don’t remember any Philippine history books mentioning about the Kiram family though I know that for a time in our glorious past, sultans governed the southern part of the Philippines. Ordinary Filipinos are not even aware that the Sultanate of Sulu is still existing; so I guess nobody took Sultan Jamalul Kiram III’s Sabah “invasion” quite seriously.

In the first place, if our republic truly acknowledges the Sultanate of Sulu and/or the sultan, then a Philippine holiday in the honor of the previous sultan/s should have been declared. Beyond the title and the written acknowledgement of the sultanate, a holiday is a sort of reminder to the people about a person or event’s legacy just like the EDSA Revolution Day. The absence of substantial information about the Sultanate of Sulu on history books and the absence of commemorative activities about the past sultans on a national level simply say that our republic does not truly acknowledge modern-day royalties.

Princess Jacel, daughter of Sultan Jamalul Kiram III, said that their family tried to communicate with Malacanang about their lease issue in Sabah. They tried to reach out to Malacanang not once, not twice but thrice but their efforts proved to be futile. Is it a proof that from the start of this issue, the Philippine government has surrendered all its sovereignty rights to Malaysia?

To make the matters more confusing, another sultan from the Kiram family is claiming that he is the real sultan and not Sultan Jamalul Kiram III. In the middle of this chaos, I learned that eight more personalities have been claiming to be the real sultan. Internally, there is disagreement within the Kiram family in the issue of who is the real sultan.

Sultan Jamalul Kiram’s desperate move to re-claim Sabah is probably his final straw to earn the attention of both governments: Malaysia and the Philippines. From what he said, his original intention was to ask for a bigger rental lease because the PhP70,000/year is not even enough to pay for an apartment in Manila. The Malaysian government is saying that this is not a rental fee but a sort of a yearly stipend for the permanent turn-over of Sabah to Malaysia.
Who fired the first shot? The bloodshed started when somebody fired the first shot. Prior to this, President Noynoy asked the sultan to leave Sabah but Sultan Jamalul Kiram III insisted that his royal army would stay in Sabah.

Many are saying that Malaysia is just reaping what it sowed when it supported the MNLF in Mindanao for 20 long years. True enough, according to Nur Misuari, founder of MNLF, some of his men are supporting Sultan Jamalul Kiram III’s army BUT without his knowledge and consent.
The people of Sabah are the most terrorized by this turn of events. The Filipinos in Sabah who have closer affiliation with the Sabahans than their fellow Filipinos from Luzon are also pushed in a lose-lose situation. In Sabah, they will face discrimination or wrath from the local people. Back home, they have the Abu Sayaff and MNLF to deal with.

To close this sovereignty and proprietory rights issue, then perhaps both Malaysia and the Philippines could bring this case to the International Court of Justice. Somebody has to stand in between the two countries and good thing, the UN interceded to end the violence. The Kiram family must be united and decide on who is the rightful sultan of Sulu because it’s funny to be watching one branch of the family fighting for their cause while another branch is claiming that Sultan Jamalul Kiram III is not the real sultan.
Wag Ka Munang Lumaki

March 9, 2013

Wedding & Family Life

“Wag ka munang lumaki, Adi, wag kang magbago.
Sana’y habambuhay magkasama tayo….” ~Mc Donald’s old commercial

If I had you when I was in my early 20’s, I guess I wouldn’t be this emotional.
Young mothers tend to take their kids for granted (I should know).
But now that I’m in my mid-30’s, I am trying to seize each opportunity to be a good mother to you and your siblings because life is too short.
Your lola left us when she was just 56 years old.
I don’t wish to live that short but I’m insecure about how time flies in this world.
That is why I’m trying to be a good mother and at the same time, I am busy preparing for your future.

I love you and your siblings in my own unique and equal way.
I love your differences in personality and at times, these differences drive me crazy!
You are the life of the party; you got my bubbly character.
Your naughtiness is infectious; you laugh like a jester.
You love to dance; one thing that I am not good at.
You are a very sweet boy, I miss you every time I’m out of town.

You are a Jollibee fan and I’m a Mcdo mom.
Ten years from now, you and Robi will no longer appreciate our dinner at Jollibee.
You will be busy with your own young life.
Don’t grow up too fast, my little one
“I love you, Mahal.”